I remember when I first got off the plane, about 2am. The humid air at such hour in the morning was my welcome to Africa, then everyone at the airport trying to be your friend, while looking for some handouts. We them drove about 3hrs to the Theis, and then definitely knew I was in the land of tengana (hospitality), the staffed welcomed us, with joy, big hugs, laughter and OFFCOURSE some dancing at about 5am. The entire I was thinking how these can people be so jovial at cette l’heurre.
I’m at the point of my service, we I’ve just accepted the little things, like taking 12hrs just to travel to the capital from my site, due to bad roads, car troubles and just plain greedy people. Accepted, that rice is a main dietary staple, people listening to music on full blast without headphones. Where little things just don’t bother me anymore, or it just depends on the day. I’m also at the point where the things and people of Senegal that I love, I love more and just appreciate, and the others that just annoy me; my tolerance for accepting them is just deteriorating. I’m, also at the point where I’m well integrated enough, that I’ve realized although I’m here to learn these people’s culture and valves, I should remember not to loose myself in the process and what I believe in, what are my values. Although by no small defeat, this will help shape Pamela.
I’m comfortable enough to let them see the true Pam, while still respecting their values, although this is not a two way street. I find myself constantly defending what, I do, why I do it and how things are just not the same in the U.S. Most of all, my thinking of “you don’t have to understand or agree with ones values and beliefs; you just have to respect it,” is now deeply rooted in me.
Is PC what I thought it would be? No. I did not have much expectations coming into PC, I just had a goal of giving back and helping my birth land, giving it something to be proud. I wanted my first home to move forward, with the help of my second, with me as a guiding light. After all that was one of my main reasons for going after my American Citizenship, to serve and become a PCV.
I was expecting more development work and experience, and less cultural exchange. I was expecting to have more projects by now (they say that usually comes in the second here), more sustainability work and a more a defined program and my purpose of being here and how to help and move the people of my community forward.
If I could go back will I still do PC? Yes. It has been one of the best experiences of my life, and I’m looking forward to my next year, with apprehension and joy. I have made a difference, I have helped my community. I’ve made long lasting friends, Senegalese and Americans. I always have a family and home somewhere here in Senegal. I’ve given people here stories to tell for years to come. I’ve placed smiles on peoples’ faces, bonded and made a connection with this country that will always be a part of me. It has raised more questions for me, about my future, my dreams aspirations, and values beliefs, relations, and relationships, and the true meaning of friendships. . It has shattered what I once knew and just giving me a new lens for looking at life.
So clinking the champagne glass and waiting for the next leg of this journey.
Thanks to those who have helped keep my sanity along the way, the emails, messages, and calls.
Loving the many parts of Pamela
:)
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